One of the hardest things in life is settings things in motion — starting things, sparking events, creating. Here I am talking big things again, but man, I just don’t know how God himself summoned the initiative to create the world in the first place. Being a god floating in the infinite spaces of nowhere, basking in your own limitless powers should have been a pretty settled life for him. I really don’t understand what drove him to get up from his golden chair and create cockroaches, cancers, Lady Gagas and all that stuff. It’s too troublesome from my perspective.
If you read or watch “Naruto,” that popular manga and anime from the (oftentimes) brilliant mind of Masashi Kishimoto, you’ll know this character, Shikamaru who’s one of my favorites. Aside from being a super genius ninja, he’s also the laziest of the lot, with an incurable habit to lie down on green meadows and just stare at the passing clouds in the sky. Now and then when other ninjas ask him to do something, he’ll utter in the sleepiest tone “Mendōkusei,” meaning, “Such a pain.” I just love his character because I can relate so much.
When the world expects me to do something, I just want to go Shikamaru on them.
Mendōkusei. Such a pain.
Little tasks, big tasks — they’re both tasks and I hate them. It’s been my belief that laziness can be inherited and since my grandfather is the embodiment of supreme laziness that forms froth in the pores, I guess some of that rubbed on my genes.
There’s just this lack of interest in me, which is usually interpreted by people as snobbery or over-confidence. I rarely smile at people, pat their backs, or greet them when we cross paths at empty hallways, sometimes even when there’s just the two of us in a deathly silent elevator.
It’s just difficult to start talking. Excruciating to say, “Hi! What’s up?” Torturous to make the slightest gestures that say “Hey, I’m here and I see you’re there and maybe we should chat like two normal human beings.” An incredibly painful thing to do.
What else pains me?
– Tying my shoelace
– Buying bottled water downstairs
– Waking the fuck up in the morning
– Waiting for MRT trains inside stations with oven-like conditions
– Praising people
– Watching uninteresting shows on other people’s TV
– Asking a random question
– Giving a random answer
– Rummaging in my head for some memories someone wants me to retrieve for the most unnecessary reasons
– Answering phone calls
– Placing books in the bookshelf, towels on the clothesline, DVDs in their cases, basically putting things in their proper containers.
– ANSWERING PHONE CALLS
– Reading someone else’s uninteresting work
– Listening to music that sounds like a lion’s den during mating season
– Counting my change
– Finding another place to work
– Planning my future
– Planning tomorrow
– Listening to a conversation that don’t concern me at all
– Making lists longer when I know I can just write “AND MORE,”
– AND MORE.
But laziness does have its advantages. Too bad I’m running out of time and I can’t find enough enthusiasm to describe them here. You’ll just have to wait until I get in the groove again.
God, it’s Friday. Mendōkusei.